Tag Archives: Hana

Two Rings and a Big Secret

A picture from our wedding day on December 29, 2012.

As of today, I have been a married woman for three whole weeks.  I’m sure the ‘veteran wives’ reading this just had a good chuckle, but I imagine for each newly wed woman (such as myself), this new sensation somehow seems to be a daily revelation.

And we didn’t even have a big wedding that, as the festivities wound down and ‘Thank You’ notes were written, this revelation began to sink in.  Nope.  I felt different from the moment I sank my bare feet into the sand in Key West, knowing that Morgan and I were the only ones in the world who knew we were getting married.  Why?  In the purest sense of the word, we eloped.

Our marriage license – a week before we got married.

Since the moment Morgan and I met at a Zimbabwean refugee camp (see An African Boy and an American Girl), nothing about us has really been normal.  We dated cross-continentally for two years while I was finishing my undergrad in the U.S./Cuba and Morgan worked as a reporter in South Africa.  We moved to Thailand and made a life there together when neither of us had ever been to Asia.  Morgan supported my dream of doing community development work when I moved to Mozambique and we were separated again.  And after four and a half years together (see Four Years with a Ninja Paleontologist), I could not imagine my life without him.

Morgan

Morgan.

Our idea to elope derived from a combination of ideas, inspired my Aunt Shirley and my sister, Hana.  Morgan and I had talked about marriage in the past, but we had always wanted what any of our same-citizenship married friends had: lots of family and friends there for the big day, cake, to wear a pretty dress and a nice suit, cake.  We wanted to wait until Morgan and I had saved up some money and could have everyone present (from South Africa and the U.S.).

While we weren’t in any rush, U.S. Immigration waits for no one and Morgan and I once again began contemplating either being apart or finding another foreign country we could both call home.  We had thought about getting married, but up until that point, we had seen only two options: a quick courthouse ceremony or an expensive ballroom-packed reception.

Then one day, a third option was presented to us: a destination wedding.

Key West.  (Source: WordPress)

Key West. (Source: WordPress)

So after one very long walk and some serious thought, Morgan and I decided to get married!  In the same notion, we decided not to tell anyone.  We knew that we would get a lot of opinions thrown into the mix and maybe even a few judgements, but no one else could walk in our shoes.  Another big factor in our decision to keep getting married a secret was that if all of my family and Morgan’s family and closest friends couldn’t be there, we thought it was most fair to everyone (and most importantly, to ourselves) to only have the two of us there.

From the moment we decided, we had exactly two weeks to plan a secret wedding.

My wedding bouquet.

My wedding bouquet.

Firstly, kudos to all of the brides out there who have planned weddings that include more than two people!  For the most part, our planning was relatively stress-free, but there were one or two moments that arose with weather or initially, finding a place to stay, that posed as curveballs.  Nonetheless, we navigated through the unknown matrimonial territory like champs.  We booked a great bed & breakfast, ordered rings, booked our wedding through one of Key West’s several wedding companies (did you know Key West is ranked one of the Top 10 Best Places to Elope?) and (in the spirit of our romantic, yet budget wedding) found perfect outfits in our closet to wear for our beach ceremony.  The only thing left to do was wait.

And then, Morgan surprised me.

The picnic.

The picnic.

Morgan drove me down to the Ellis Wainwright Park in Miami where he pulled out a large picnic basket for a romantic little picnic, complete with hummus, crackers, various cheeses, strawberries and delicious mimosas.

Sunset

It was the most beautiful day.  Not a cloud in the sky.

As we watched the sun go down over the water, Morgan wanted me to take a walk with him to a certain part of the park.  Naturally, I told him that it looked like women got kidnapped in that part of the park and asked why he would want to go there.  But given that he’d put so much planning into our picnic, I conceded and we went.

When we arrived at a gazebo, Morgan’s hands began shaking as he dropped to one knee and pulled out my ring.  To be perfectly honest, I only remember bits and pieces of what he said because I started to cry.  A lot.  But I do remember saying ‘yes’ when he asked me to marry him.

Newly engaged (officially).

Newly engaged (officially).

It’s a funny thing that his hands shook and I cried so much after we had already discussed and decided to get married.  But simply because we didn’t have a lot of money and no one else knew we were getting married didn’t mean that we wanted to miss out on all of the experiences that people in love treasure most.  I couldn’t have loved him more.

On our way

Driving through the Keys on our way to Key West.

After spending Christmas with my family, we told them we were going to go for a little vacation in the Keys and would be back in a few days.  With that, we began our last adventure as boyfriend and girlfriend.

The Coco Plum Inn in Key West

The Coco Plum Inn in Key West.

While it was the peak of high season down in the Keys, we did manage to find a fantastic little B&B that I would recommend to anyone visiting Key West.  The family that owns The Coco Plum Inn treats every guest like another member of their family and the breakfast is unbeatable.  Given that Morgan and I weren’t having a traditional wedding, I figured, why diet like a traditional bride?  I ate biscuits with sausage gravy every morning and it was delicious.

Mimosas for the soon-to-be newly weds!

Mimosas for the soon-to-be newly weds!

We had two days in Key West before we got married and one day after, so we decided to enjoy every moment in paradise.  We visited some of the historical homes, watched street performances, ate as much as possible and made a lot of friends.  The number of people who wanted to know our story and how we decided to elope amazed us!  It seemed as though every other person in Key West was cheering us on.

Sunset cruise the night before we got married.

We went on a sunset cruise the night before we got married.

And then the day had arrived!  It was December 29, 2012 and Morgan and I were getting married.

Our wedding was scheduled for the late afternoon and as excited as I was, I was equally nervous.  While I spent a good deal of the morning telling Morgan that I felt like I was going to be sick, he remained calm and composed.  He said he felt fine and couldn’t be happier.  I left him for a few hours while I got my hair and makeup done and when he came to meet me at the salon, he just stared.  He told me I looked beautiful and then immediately following, he told me that he suddenly felt sick, too.  Clearly, nerves had gotten the better of us.

But when we met the wedding company and arrived at the beach, the nerves began to slowly subside and we realized what we were actually doing.

And it was amazing.

My husband and I.

My husband and I.

Upon arriving back from Key West, we told nine different groups of family members in nine different ways (over dinner, over breakfast, Skype, email, phone, in the car, over coffee) … but that’s a story for another time.

Suffice to say, everyone was supportive and expressed a great deal of love and happiness.

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365 Days as a Globetrotter

Me and my backpack (that I bought sophomore year!) in Bangkok

Happy anniversary to me and my backpack!

One year ago today, I left the West Palm Beach airport headed to Durban, South Africa.  I’d graduated from UNC in May, worked at Seacamp from then until October and for about a week at the end of October, I wondered whether to accept a job at Seacamp or to head into the corporate world.

…And naturally, I boarded a plane to Africa.

My plan, or what I had of one, was to see Morgan and stay the three months in South Africa that my visitor’s visa would allow.  Twelve months later, here I am with Morgan in our apartment in Phuket, Thailand getting takeout for dinner and thinking about how it is that I got here.

The following are some initial thoughts:
-Morgan was working in Durban and we hadn’t seen each other for nearly 10 months.  A visit was slightly overdue.
-As a Cuban/Japanese/Irish/second-generation American, maybe I was meant to feel fairly comfortable in any part of the world.
-I’d never been to Asia.
-I quit my nanny job in South Africa.  ‘Communists’/’boorish Americans’ do things like that.
-South Africa has somewhere between a 25%-33% unemployment rate meaning unless I had a PhD or 5+ years work experience in a particular field, as a foreigner, I wasn’t about to be hired (hence the nanny job).
-Morgan was at a break-point in his eTV career and wanted to travel.
-We were both looking for adventure…and needed to find a country where we could both get jobs.
-I wanted to still be near the beach.

So after I’d spent five months in South Africa, we left for Thailand.  Seven months later, I’m in my second semester as a kindergarten teacher in Phuket.  I’m practicing bikram yoga daily (or trying to) and exploring the country by motorbike, bus or rented car as often as possible.  I know a few Thai phrases (mostly that pertain to defecating in the toilet due to the nature of my work) and I can confidently say that I live in a country with some of the best food in the world.

That’s not to say I don’t miss my family and friends back home.  I often wish I could see my little brother pitch at his JV baseball games or visit my sister at her new apartment in Gainesville.  Or that I was in Key West for Fantasy Fest.

But from my past 365 consecutive days of living outside the US (and maybe another 365 non-consecutive days from previous travels), I’m slowly coming to learn that you can make a life for yourself  just about anywhere.  Just pack up, pick up and go!  That being said, appreciate who you are and where you come from.  Most importantly, make the journey worth it.

Here’s to another five months in Thailand!  After that is yet to be determined, but surely another grand adventure.

I'm still telling Tales of an Aspiring Globetrotter.

(See ‘My Old Blog’ under Other Places to Find Kassie to read about my earlier days of globetrotting.)

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7 Months Away From Home

Weekend reading by the pool: Truth is a Strange Fruit.

I left the U.S. on November 4, 2010 bound for South Africa… and here I am in Thailand, seven months later.

Every single day has been an adventure, particularly given the fact that I told friends and family that I would only be gone for 90 days.  I went shark diving in Durban, au paired for three of the five months I was in South Africa and I experimented with baking cakes, cupcakes and any other pastry that even sounded like it might be tasty.  Then I completed a TEFL course and boarded a plane to Thailand.

To be honest, I love traveling.  I feel honored and privileged that  I’ve had so many opportunities to explore new places, new cultures, new people.  I’ve used the few Zulu and Thai phrases I know to get by when English didn’t suffice and I’ve sampled (scratch that, devoured) some of the best food out there.  Even more importantly, I’ve had a great travel companion/friend/boyfriend every step of the way.  He is just as eager to dive/jump/crawl as I am!

…And while I wouldn’t say that I’m homesick, I do miss my family and friends.  I wish they could all fly out here and join in the fun.  If I were a millionaire (in $US, ZAR or THB), I would have already paid their airfares and we would all be out on Phi Phi Island, diving and soaking up the sun.  Reality reminds me that I’m a teacher in Thailand, so the chances of ever becoming a millionaire in any of those currencies is rather slim.  Postcards will have to suffice for now.

And also some recognition.

-My sister, Hana: An awesome 18-year-old going into her sophomore year at UF with a 4.0 GPA and freelance experience with The Palm Beach Post.  She’s the family ‘rock’ and she deserves far more than she ever gets.

-My brother, George: Turns 16 in October and loves gaming.  I wish I could see more of his baseball games (he’s a great pitcher!).  If he gets it together in school, I know he’ll be playing baseball or soccer in college.  He’s a good kid and a very cool baby brother.

-My grandparents, Abuela and Abuelo: What would I do without them?  And why did I only start speaking Spanish to my Cuban grandparents when I was 21?  They’ve been there at every graduation; they’ve made various trips to UNC; they were there when I crossed the finish line at Ironman Cozumel in Mexico.

-My mom, Lourdes: Always helping me out, even now.  Driving 12 hours non-stop when I think a broken heart might never heal (and it always does).  She still sends me cards, no matter where I am, for every holiday (Valentine’s Day, birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, etc).

-My dad, George: Hard-working and always finds a way to accomplish any task.  His pride in me means the world.

-My Aunt Shirley: I wish we had started talking this much years ago.  Definitely an inspiration in any/all of my baking attempts, although my work will never quite measure up to her chocolate cream cheese frosting.  …Or her chocolate cheesecake espresso brownies.  Mmm.

…And now I miss brownies.

But for the here and now, I am happy in Thailand. I think that missing my family allows me to love and appreciate them in a different way (without being too cliche) and I’m excited about receiving my first paycheck (T-minus 2 days!) so I can start sending gifts.

From Phuket, with love.

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